Pretty great.

Via Vulture.

Last night, the season debut picked up where last season left off, with Sookie in the gauzy, douche-commercial that is Fairy Land. Thankfully, we only had to stay long enough for her to reunite with her long-lost Grandpa, a terrifically miscast Gary Cole, and Nancy Drew her way out of a trap involving glowing oranges. A "Land of the Lost"-bad CGI battle between Sookie and troll-looking fairies came close to elevating Fairy Land from plain terrible to WTF-terrible, but not quite.

But, hey guess what? Time moved at a crawl in Fairy Land, and while Sookie felt like she was only gone for five minutes, she'd actually been missing for more than year. So the rest of the episode catches us up on what's changed in her absence. The major developments in order of how much I enjoyed them:

1. Sam is now part of an anger-management, shifter support group. That he found on Craigslist? They drink wine, talk about their biologic predisposition to anger and strip down and gallop in the woods as horses.

2. Tara's left her trembling lip in Bon Temps, and is now Toni the lesbian cage fighter from Atlanta. Just as silly as before, but far, far less tedious.

3. Bill has a new haircut and has somehow become the King of Louisiana. Which explains why he can command Erik to leave when both show up on Sookie's doorstep after she returns from Fairy Land. Bill's new status comes as a reveal in the final minutes, so undoubtedly we'll learn the details in the next several episodes.

4. Lafayette has a Mohawk. He's also still with Jesus, who really wants him to be part of his coven. Too bad Lala's reluctance can't stand up to the creepy charisma of head witch Marnie, who's clearly the villain of this season.

Hopes for the coming weeks: A quick end to the spawn of Satan storyline with Arleen and Terry. More vampire politics. Jessica in full on hedonism mode. Some life at home with Tommy and Mrs. Fortenberry. More werepanthers!

Our favorite trash-soap returns in just a little more than a month. On tap this season based on this teaser: witchy women, shirtless men and more of that put-upon Sookie wit we've come to sort of love.

The fourth season of "True Blood," scheduled to debut in June on HBO, draws, unsurprisingly, from Charlaine Harris' fourth Sookie Stockhouse novel, "Dead to the World." Creator Alan Ball and the cast of "True Blood" dished on what to expect recently, the LA Times reports.

Of Sookie, Paquin said, "She's been on a bit of an adventure, she comes back. She's still very new to all this fairy stuff."

Paquin added that Sookie's still grappling with how to control her "microwave" fingers. As for her romantic prospects, she focused mostly on Joe Manganiello's werewolf Alcide ("Alcide doesn't turn into a ball of charred fire during the daytime, Alcide has that nice warm thing going, but Alcide comes with some baggage") and the resident Viking ("Eric's a little problematic," Paquin said).

Eric, though, is rather different than he's been in previous seasons. "He's completely lost and he doesn't know who he is. This powerful character is just gone," Skarsgard said, noting cryptically, "Eric needs help… there are a lot of friendly people in Bon Temps who are kind enough to help Eric."

In terms of the rest of Bon Temps residents, Rutina Wesley's Tara will find some stability after a harrowing couple of seasons, Nelsan Elils' Lafayette is "under the spell" of his boyfriend Jesus (Kevin Alejandro), Chris Bauer's Sheriff Andy Bellefleur will likely begin to experiment with V and Sam Trammell's shape-shifting bar owner Sam will get another chance at love, though the odds of things working out, he said, were "slim."

On May 3, Charlaine Harris will publish "Dead Reckoning," the 11th novel in her Southern Vampire series. Fans best savor it. Because only two more (contractually-obligated) editions of the Sookie Stackhouse saga will follow.

“It’s been a big part of my life and I hate to see it go," Harris recently told the Wall Street Journal. "But it’s kind of taken over my professional life, and I’m excited for new opportunities.”

Those new opportunities, according to the WSJ, include providing story guidance on "Dying for Daylight," a computer game based on Dahlia, a she-vampire from one of Harris' short stories.

Here's the gist according to the WSJ:

Produced by the games publisher I-Play, the interactive platform allows players to help Dahlia as she battles various vampire sects and prevents a powerful sun potion — that allows vampires to survive in daylight — from falling into the wrong hands.

With 'True Mud.'

Gripping stuff.

Ugh. Same song, different verse.

Despite the mid-season promise of a battle royale between vampire royalty, Sookie's suitors and werewolves, not only did none materialize in the season finale, just about every plot turn was unsatisfying or downright dumb.

Except, of course, the big, long overdue Bill reveal. We've known he'd be outed as a spy forever, but it was still a little bit thrilling to see him flying out of Sookie's front door as she banished him. It'll be interesting to see how his character evolves now that his courtly Southern vampire act has been exposed. Even knowing that he was capable of treachery, it was still pretty shocking to see him try to kill Eric.

Vampire powers sidenote: What's with his ability to perfectly mimic Eric's voice? Is this some latent vampire power? Also, in a sexless episode, the best we got is that Bill's ability to not gorge Sookie is "tantric." Steely like Sting, yo.

Otherwise, lots of groan-worthy stuff on characters taking deep, life altering looks in the mirror: The shimmering ghost of the Messiah Godric appears to Eric and convinces him to spare Russell. Peace and forgiveness and what not. Die already, Godric, to never rise again and lend Eric too much compassion. Sookie continues to be the vehicle through which the audience expresses its frustration: After Eric tells her to go retrieve burnt-pinata-looking Russell, she says, "You want me to go get the guy who wants to kill us all and bring him inside?” Yeah, I'm not buying it either.

"They canceled 'Deadwood' for this shit?"

Ah yes, but not as lame as some of the other Tolkein-esque names for fairies, according to Bill (I'm sure I'm spelling them all wrong): "phendrae, elanon, the old people." And—wait for it—"aliens."

That's right, at least according to Bill, who we've been reminded eighty jillion times "CAN'T BE TRUSTED", Sookie is part alien. A Fae-lien "coupled" with one of her ancestors. Or "raped," as Sookie says, cutting through fang-rapist Bill's euphemism.

Hide your kids! Let the protests begin!

Now, with all that simmering in the background, "True Blood's" scribes can dig into an even more obvious side of the vampire: the blood-drunk psychopath. Franklin was great early on — his scene with Jessica and the severed head remains among this season's best — but his mania got cartoonish the longer he stuck around. Now, with him out of the picture for good (RIP, probably, to Tara's trembling lip, too), a new psycho emerged last night. He's the villain we've been waiting for on "True Blood."

Not that the King of Mississippi was quite on the level before. But once he wallowed in Talbot's ooze in the opening scene, we said goodbye to the genteel madman of episodes past. In his place: a grief-stricken fascist who carries around a crystal punchbowl filled with vampire innards, rips out a newsman's spine and asks America, "“Why would we seek equal rights? You are not our equals. We will eat you, after we eat your children.”

Yes!

Also, Jesus and Lafayette hook up, which prompts a change in "LaLa" that his mother recognizes. When he tells her it's because of Jesus, she offers, “Maybe God loves fags?” Jessica and Hoyt have a tender moment that involves Hoyt's well-known hatred of dolls. Crystal can't deal with Jason's dumbness. Tommy has loud sex and a confrontation with Sam. Later, Sam, possibly riled from his fight with Tommy, beats Crystal's meth-dealing shifter (?) father senseless in Merlotte's. Which seemed way out of character for him, though seeing him unhinged wouldn't be terrible. And Bill dreams his way into gauzy fairyland for a convo with Claudine, where he finds out — DA DUM — what she is.

Whadda you bet they're going to stretch the reveal out through the next three episodes?

"Werebitch" Debbie sets the tone early, blubbering to the King of Mississippi, "They killed my Cooter!"

A sly bunch, the "True Blood" writing staff.

Sookie, as usual, is where the action is. Her response to nearly dying from fang-rape has three acts:

1. She casts Bill out, telling him, "I can't even imagine beginning to forgive you." Good for her, we all say. Because he nearly killed her and is duplicitous, but mostly because he's a huge bore. On his way out, he tells her to lie in the sun and have babies while tears of blood stream down his face.

2. She takes his advice and sunbathes. Tara, taking a break from trembling her lip (seriously, when is someone going to do a montage?), sparks relationship talk. Sookie: "What we had was real, and I can't just flip a switch and turn my heart off.” Yikes. Tara, almost redeeming her terrible accent and all the lip trembling — actually, not even close, but still positive: “You know what you sound like, one of those sad country songs about dumb bitches that let their man cheat and beat on them all for the sake of true love.”

3. Russel and the were-bitch come for Sookie. Lots of girl-fighting. Bill lives only because Erik has seduced the King of Mississippi's consort and consummated the union with a stake in the back, and the King of Mississippi feels the pain and flees. Sookie and Bill celebrate near death by choking each other out during sex.

Elsewhere, in case you didn't get that Erik is masterminding a complex, multi-step plan for revenge that involves collateral damage, he plays chess. Jason, after killing Eggs last season, seems to have developed a vigilante blood lust. Good to see him on his way to doing something darkly misguided instead of just plain dumbly misguided. Bill and Jessica practice Matrix moves. Alfre Woodard escapes the mental hospital to say funny things and warn Lafayette that bad things/people are after him.

Or something like that. Right? Surely that's what the gauzy dream sequence, filled with woodland creatures chirping and frolicking in frilly clothes, suggests. "True Blood," after all, is not much for hiding narrative too deep in symbolism. Totally fairies.

Claudine, Sookie's dream fairy godmother, warns Sookie not to let "him" steal her light. Which, again, doesn't appear to be a metaphor for anything so much as a reference to some latent power. The one that allows Bill to not die in the sunlight, perhaps?

Elsewhere, Tara continues to tremble her lip, when not hulking out thanks to a large dose of V. Alcide continues to recede into dullness. Sam finally tells his absentee dad he's nothing more than a scared old man in saggy underwear. Lorena dies in a volcano of blood and is remembered after the show in a pretty great video montage that collects all the money shots in her gruesomely violent relationship with Bill (we'll never forget the head twisting hate sex). Hoyt's new lady friend wants him to taste her biscuits. And, most entertainingly, the King of Mississippi's genteel fascism gets a big platform. Looks like there's a vampire war on the horizon.

Best episode yet this season.

Sookie still loves Bill, even though he betrayed her with Lorena, who also still loves Bill — and cries tears of blood to prove it — but must torture him grotesquely. Sam, despite his recent show of brotherly love, can't pull Tommy away from his terrible parents; and Tommy, as predicted, loves them enough that he subjugates himself to dog fights. And Franklin, who barely counts since he's so off his rocker, loves Tara enough to let her bite him before he makes her his vampire bride. Later, she bludgeons him with a mace.

Similarly but more on the periphery: Jesus tells Lafayette that he doesn't know who his father is because he's the product of rape, which leads Lafayette to say, "Maybe I can relate to you." Crystal, still dry humping Jason in the swamp, throws him on the ground, which inspires him to say, "Don't hurt me. Or do." Which freaks Crystal out moments before she sniffs the air and arches her back and runs away. Like a woodland creature.

Creator Alan Ball wrote last night's episode, which marked the halfway point of the 12 episode season. Next episode, I'm betting the ascendant arc for most of our characters starts, slowly but surely. Then, for the finale, Ball returns to make everything go to hell again.

Random thoughts:

*The lottery ticket scene with the Queen of Louisiana was great.

*I'd forgotten how utterly obfuscating "Mad Men's" scenes from next week are. All they really offer is: These people will have dialogue next week. On the other hand, "True Blood's" condense all the action, often with spoilers, into its teasers. They're always better than the episodes themselves.

1. Sookie and the beefy werewolf help each other with problems of the heart, inch closer towards being tempted by the fruit of each other and fight people.
2. Sam tries to set up his long lost family with a place to live and jobs. But his pa ain't having it.
3. Increasingly nutty vampire detective Franklin "woos" Tara, who as usual does little but make her lip quiver.
4. Bill, Erik and the King of Mississippi plot and connive together and, increasingly, apart.
5. Lafayette makes googly eyes at Jesus, his mom's nurse.
6. Jason plays at becoming a cop, meets a mysterious woman.

That's not rare for an episodic hour-long drama that's built up a lot mythology, but because "TB" veers so often from slapstick to drama to horror to soap-opera-style romance, the tonal shifts often feel really, really jarring. None more so than last night's episode. Where we went (perhaps not in this precise order) from an '80s-movie-style montage of Jason killing time in the police station to a flashback of Erik's viking king father murdered by werewolves to the interminable flirt-off at a pool table between Lafayette and Jesus that's pictured above.