Wednesday, November 28, 2012

America’s New Cary Grants: sending photos of our nether regions to impress women

Posted By on Wed, Nov 28, 2012 at 10:22 AM

A learning experience is one of those things that say, “You know that thing you just did? Don’t do that.” - - Douglas Adams

Last week a Fayetteville businessman (Jeffrey B. Ash) was arrested in Idaho after he used his cell phone to expose himself to a woman. Far from being being impressed, the woman called the local constabulary, who came to collect Comrade Ash.

Once they got to his motel room they discovered the would-be Romeo had almost 30 pounds of marijuana stuffed into two duffel bags.

Oh, Jeffrey.

Perhaps if you had spent more time watching Turner Classic Movies and less time watching Spike TV, you might have a better idea of how to charm someone. But aiming a camera at your private parts has all the charm of a 16 year old boy whose parents have left him all alone for the weekend.

And Ash was, at one point in his life, an amateur world disc golf champion (okay, I have no idea what that is) for players over 40.

Now, he is just another sex offender. Nice going.

Oh, yeah, and the drug charges.

Leaving the drugs aside, what made Ash think he could impress a woman by turning on his cell phone and showing her a picture of . . . what? So many puns come to mind, and yet I refuse to use them, because this sad man is probably going to jail. I feel that much pity for him.

And yet, this what our culture has descended to - where once we read poetry to our intended, now we send a photo of how much they mean to us? Literally?

Just trying to imagine what these jokers would do on Valentine’s Day has me reaching for the barf bag. They could probably put the floral industry out of business in a few years at this rate.


Quote of the Day

Nothing makes your sense of humor disappear faster than having somebody ask where it is. - Ivern Ball



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