Norma Bates 
Member since Jun 4, 2010


Renowned ICE Lecturer (International Consultant on Everything). Performance Artiste. Bi-Partisan Trophy Escort. Nanny. One busy little beaver, I.

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Lolling, lounging and luxuriating in L.A.

Updated on March 1, 2011 at 9:34 PM

Recent Comments

Re: “News roundup and the open line

The Darlenes wrapped up a wine-taster celebration of the President's executive order prohibiting LGBT discrimination, with a riotous sharefest of salient video treats prior to yours truly designatedly driving the pack home.

Ink barely dry on Obama's signature, Christianist screecher Carmen Fowler LaBerge – her real name, for some ungodly reason – goose-stepped out of the gate honking about "sincerely held religious beliefs" and Christians being unable to ignore whatever laws they want in order to legally force whatever stupidity, hate and bigotry they like on other Americans in the name of Jesus. How quickly she forgets Hobby Lobby and the Catholic male SCOTUS majority.

Meanwhile, creationist idiot and celebrity wannabe Ken Ham speaks from the infinite void between his ears to scold America for wasting billions searching for life in space because Adam sinned and aliens, if any, are going to hell anyway.

Not to be outdone, the Pope, last week, spoke from the void in the Vatican's coffers, reinstating some sort of long-dormant college for exorcists or something; doing his bit to keep superstition and fear alive among the "faithful" – now synonymous with "deluded" and "victim," Bernie Madoff fans, Amway distributors and Mary Kay associates.

Good thing your Norma doesn't imbibe spirits, what with Jesus and Xenu and Moroni and Romney and Perry and Huckabee and the Minneapolis Archdiocese and Israel's Jews and Gaza's Muslims and Hindu rapists all whirling, dervish-like, in some parallel universe "Dancing with the Stars."

Sadly, erstwhile celebrity channeler JZ Knight – long Linda Evans' favorite 35,000 year old warrior mouthpiece – has apparently taken spirits to a whole 'nother level. She's suing former followers for posting videos of her (or Ramtha's) drunken rantings against Jews and gays.

In this one, she (or he) even rages (and slurs, snorts or sniffs) against Linda herself, seen in Ramtha's audience, smile botoxed in place, while ol' JZ (or is it Ramtha?) woozily singles her out to say, "Fuck you."…

Yes, Razorbabies, those faces (including Linda's) in Ramtha's audience are how it all ends.

Just another week in the ever-escalating yet incredibly slow religious dramedy, The Emperor Has No Clothes.

The Darlenes couldn't BE more delighted.

Posted by Norma Bates on 07/22/2014 at 2:21 AM

Re: “Tom Cotton is perfect — for Arizona


Because all your most desirable - economically, culturally and socially successful states with your best jobs, most opportunities, greatest diversity - are your backward, reactionary, misogynist, homophobic, racist, anti-union, anti-science, anti-public education, pro-Christian states.


17 likes, 0 dislikes
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/21/2014 at 3:31 PM

Re: “Tom Cotton is perfect — for Arizona

Sounds like the Kochs are betting Arkansas's majority are politically uninformed, irrational, stupid, knee-jerk conservatives.

Bank on it.

19 likes, 1 dislike
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/21/2014 at 1:37 PM

Re: “D.C. politics come to Little Rock — GOP demands loyalty

"Aunt Norma, are all fatties – ?"

"I'm not your aunt, sweetheart. Just your Mommy's best friend and we don't say 'fatties.' They're 'people of size.'"

"Are they all bullies?"

"Why, yes they are, darling. You're so perspicacious! Why do you ask?"

"This blimp Bobby Charmody is mean and horrible except he tries to be all funny and he sucks up to the teachers so they feel sorry for him. Everybody else hates him."

"Self-esteem issues. Passive-aggressive. That's why they're bullies. They're angry. So they eat to feel better. But they get bigger and bigger so they eat more and more to feel better and better only they feel angrier and angrier so it's a vicious cycle. And not 'blimp,' honey. 'People of size.'"

"It's gross. Am I gonna be fat?"

"Not in Hollywood, precious."

"What about Melissa McCarthy?"

"One-trick pony. SOMEBODY'S gotta play the heifers. What's she gonna do: Maleficent?"

"Is she a bully?"

"Seen her movies?"

11 likes, 5 dislikes
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/20/2014 at 1:26 PM

Re: “Greetings from Prague — and an open line

Meanwhile, for those who don't know or couldn't care less what the deliberate attack by Russia-Ukraine on a passenger flight, killing all 298 people aboard, means for the rest of us - namely, the world - here it is in a nutshell.…

2 likes, 0 dislikes
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/19/2014 at 11:56 PM

Re: “Chris Christie, Mitt Romney to campaign in Arkansas for Asa Hutchinson

Two losers; yet one rich in dollars, one rich in pounds.

How thrilling for you.

Chuck Norris and Mike Huckabee were busy (or just shrugalicious)?

14 likes, 5 dislikes
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/19/2014 at 4:21 PM

Re: “Woo Pig Sooie! It's another chilly open line. And Obama will strike another blow for equal rights

Not ALL children, apparently.

178,805 Germans left the Catholic Church last year. 118,335 left the previous year.…

8 likes, 0 dislikes
Posted by Norma Bates on 07/18/2014 at 7:57 PM

All Comments »

  • Re: News roundup and the open line

    • The Darlenes wrapped up a wine-taster celebration of the President's executive order prohibiting LGBT discrimination,…

    • on July 22, 2014
  • Re: News roundup and the open line

    • NVR, in Chickenopolis I come across people fitting the description regularly. Sad.

    • on July 22, 2014
  • Re: News roundup and the open line

    • I missed it if someone posted this recently. Well worth the read I was poor,…

    • on July 21, 2014


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