Arkansas Blog

OK....I'll bite. Here is the exact way you can help prevent a teenager from getting preggers. I'll give it to you free...won't cost you 176 million. Talking about sex with your mother is always icky, same with talking about sex with your kids. And as they grow up, talking about sex with your kids doesn't get any easier or less embarrassing. But your sex parts made em and it's up to you to explain how it all works...icky or not....and really...it's always icky.

I was lucky enough to have 2 daughters. Thanks to their Mother's good genes, they're good looking daughters too. So after the first one came along I started worrying about the day when sex would become an issue in our family. First of all, we never told them that a stork brought them or they hatched in a rabbit patch. They'll get plenty of make believe growing up and no matter that spinning make believe makes you feel better....step up to the plate and do your job.

So take a deep breath and answer their sex questions when they pop up and they will pop up. You don't have to go into deep detail the first few times around, but do leave the Disney stuff out of it. Chances are, some girl your kid knows will get pregnant way early. Sooner or later your kid will mention it and there is your opening to start talking to them about all the ways people can have sex without causing a pregnancy.

I know....you really want to say something so horrible that your kid will never even think about having sex. But it won't work. Whacking them with the Bible won't work either. Telling them sex is a sin or sick or horrible...is just going to make some psychiatrist rich in the future. Sex is none of those things...it's as natural as the nose on your face. The flu germs causing you to sniffle right now are in your body to have sex. The more they reproduce, the sicker you become. So please don't take the easy way out and condemn sex...cause it's not gonna work.

You can tell a human not to eat greasy chili dogs, but you can't tell them not to eat. Same with sex....at some point nature and nurture and rampaging hormones are going to loosen your kid's belt. Go ahead and tell them that's natural too, but that it can cause a whole lot of trouble if it happens at the wrong time in their lives. Give them the not quiet factual message that only dumb people get pregnant by accident. I hate to be so hard on dumb people, but that line got my oldest to thinking and next thing I knew...I heard her saying that too.

Follow that up by saying that when the time comes that your child thinks there is a danger of sex cropping up, that you expect them to come to you or your spouse and say...it's time for birth control. I think my oldest was about 12 when I started giving her that message. No lectures, no crying to Jesus, no punishment, no strings. Buying birth control is a lot cheaper and easier than raising your own grandchild when you're 37. I know it won't stop aids or herpes, but it's the best we can do this side of chaining our kids in the basement for life.

Let's review. Start from birth talking honestly about sex and sex parts and it will feel icky. Then promote the idea that only dumb people accidentally get pregnant. Then tell them you expect them to come ask for help getting birth control when they think sex is on their menu. My kid was 18 when that request came in and I am more than happy to fork over 45 bucks a month to help her hold off pregnancy until the time is right in her life.

Think about it.....you did exactly what you wanted to do when you wanted to do it. Your kid is probably no better or worse than you were. If you make sex a big boogie man or drama or mortal sin.....your just making life harder for you and your children and upping the odds you'll be picking between an abortion clinic or the delivery room before it's time.

Common sense, what a novel idea. Unfortunately that quaint little notion requires basic honesty and logic and we Americans don't seem very willing to apply those tools to much of anything if it might cause a stir or feel even a little uncomfortable.

We just elect the Pryors without knowing they are anti choice and later, when we find out he is against every single womans individual liberty, we just sit back and say, well he's a nice guy and at least he is a Democrat. ANd we silently tell ourselves politicians like Hillary will fix everything, but we know after a small amount of reading that a president hillary cannot possibly get what the country wants if she is willing to set aside common sense and campaign for the Pryors and Liebermans of the xenophobic world. We just allow sitting senators to push through federalist judges whenever they can. We just sit back when pharmacies deny a customer the medications prescribed by their doctor. We sit back when a few people block entry to health clinics to all women. We sit back and allow millions of our dollars to be spent on teaching our kids Anti common sense..

We send checks to NARAL and P. Parenthood and watch them sit back and silently support many sitting politicians who are taking our money and using it against us.. This is especially true for NARAL, do not waste your energy or money on NARAL if you want an ardent defense of womens rights. Planned Parenthood still provides heath services but seems quite unaware of the real policies/actions of some of the politicians it supports.

Look at our country.. it's sex, health, war, taxation, and energy policies are all Anti common sense.

Just one thing kept me "pure" before marriage..........
I loved living.