Huckabee's speech
Homestate coverage lauded his "trademark zingers." But, sorry. Our very own former Bro. Gov., the very irreverent Mike Huckabee, was no Mario Cuomo or Barack Obama at the Republican National Convention last night. He's given great speeches in his day. But I thought he mailed this one in, perhaps a sign that, as he said, he'd have much rather been speaking tonight to accept the GOP nomination.
Familar Huck touchstones -- Lava soap, Elvis, complaints about the elite media -- all were reheated soup for anyone who's ever endured The Huckster's Rolling Parable Show. But this was worse:
* There was the tired (and nonsensical -- "half creepy and half incomprehensible" in the words of NY Times) tale about the Joe T. Robinson school room with no desks. James Fallows explains at some length what's so wrong about that missing-desks tale that Huck likes so much.
A minor point, so why mention it: somehow a little portion of each of our brains and souls is zapped away each time a prominent figure says something that is obvious nonsense -- remember, the Nazis had school desks too! -- and knows he can count on a cheer by a closing reference to country and flag.
Our Bob Lancaster roasted Huck on this dumb tale the first time it emerged.
* He was immediately corrected on national TV for two errors of typical Huckabee exaggeration -- 1) saying Sarah Palin had gotten more votes running for mayor of Wasilla than Joe Biden had gotten running for president and 2) saying Abraham Lincoln founded the Republican Party. The latter boner was much discussed.
* Then there was his fiction about John McCain as a POW. McCain did, too, renounce the country as most did or would under torture. But, of course, The Huckster had to improve the record.
* Huckabee also misquoted Honest Abe, attributing a Gerald Ford quote to the great railsplitter.
* Oh, and there was the Madonna groaner. Madonna's hubby, Guy Ritchie, has fired back at The Huckster's "tacky" remark.
Given that Hucks' speech was lost in the spotlight on v.p. nominee Sarah Palin, it's probably of little moment. But the speech seemed unlikely to catapult him politically, except back to the cheap seats. Imagine, for a second, if this had been a speech of the Republican presidential nominee. You'd have been cringing.
For those who missed it: The transcript.



Comments
Huckabee gave a great speech, there is no wonder how he fooled so many people during his campaign. He did walk out while Palin was speaking, I wonder what the back story on that was.
Off topic, why is my water brown this morning? This would happen in one place I lived when they "flushed" the pipes to "clean" them in the fall, but in this weather I doubt the city has been opening fire hydrants.
Is it safe to drink?
Posted by: Newintown
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September 4, 2008 06:24 AM
I think you'll find the essence of the quote about government in John C. Calhoun's "Disquisition on Civil Government," where he was making a case for states rights.
Posted by: williecardnickel
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September 4, 2008 07:29 AM
Excerpted rom NY Times today:
Editorial
Running Against Themselves
Three days into the Republican National Convention, it is clear that the G.O.P. has settled on a message: "Washington is not working." The phrase is included in virtually every speech and every statement in St Paul.
We agree completely that Washington is in desperate need of renewal and reform. We're not even going to quibble about the fact that Barack Obama said it first. The problem is that American voters have yet to hear - from John McCain or his warm-up acts - any serious ideas on what, exactly, is wrong with Washington, apart from the fact that a Democrat might win the White House, never mind how to truly fix it.
The difficulty for the Republican ticket in talking about change and reform and acting like insurgents is that they have been running Washington - the White House and Congress - for most of the last eight years.
Sarah Palin, the vice presidential nominee, was a combative and witty relief at a torpid convention. But it was bizarre hearing the running mate of a 26-year veteran of Congress, a woman who was picked to placate the right-wing elite, mocking "the permanent political establishment in Washington."
Posted by: PVNasby
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September 4, 2008 07:45 AM
Huck like all his "ME" "ME" republican comrades have mile deep mouths and zero solutions. Just glitz glitz glitz and more glitz!
From where I stand 99% of the problems this country is facing at this moment was generated by inept GOP leadership. If they actually loved America that they say they do voluntarily stand in line for prison and criminal repentance.
Since the reign of President Eisenhower Richard Nixon has been the GodOfPlenty's most ethical standard barrier.
Don't you just love them? Hell they have be so convinced that I'm still waiting for my trickle-down wealth that I was promised 25 years ago.
Posted by: BWC
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September 4, 2008 07:46 AM
Slight correction--If the republicants actually loved America like they say they do they would voluntarily stand in line for prison and criminal repentance.
Posted by: BWC
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September 4, 2008 07:51 AM
Didn't the Huck look a little, dare I say, it..."unsvelte"?
Posted by: sjp
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September 4, 2008 08:15 AM
Shorter Palin: And I'll go to Washington to fight against what my running mate voted for 95% of the time.
Posted by: mag
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September 4, 2008 08:24 AM
Shorter Palin: And I'll go to Washington to fight against what my running mate voted for 95% of the time.
Posted by: mag
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September 4, 2008 08:25 AM
The fact is Huckabee was elected Governor and has made a speech at a Major National Political Convention something you in your would have, should have life will never come close to. He will never have to work for a free, local, weekly.
ARK. BLOG: Naw, he's unqualified.
Posted by: Billary
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September 4, 2008 08:48 AM
Gosh, Billary. Praising Huck and the Repub speakers is like praising the height of the tallest buildings in Lonoke.
I agree with you Max that Huck's resume is a little bit padded: long on style, very short on substance. I'm not sure his ethics background help in either.
Posted by: Jake da Snake
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September 4, 2008 09:18 AM
Oh yeah. He's obviously porkin' back up
Posted by: UncleEarl
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September 4, 2008 09:29 AM
But he will never have to work for a free weekly and have his wife support him.
ARK. BLOG: Ah yes. of course. I must be a lowly welfare case grateful for the charity of friends and relatives. I fill my hours in free toil. My only reward is that my work is for a publication so meaningless that a day rarely passes without a dose or three of your incomprehensible bitterness. As ever, we welcome all comers, even the ill-informed. Even Mike Huckabee is welcome to comment here, signed or unsigned. But, no, he'll receive no payment, so I don't guess he'll come calling.
Posted by: Billary
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September 4, 2008 10:12 AM
>>But he will never have to work for a free weekly and have his wife support him.
I would gladly live off my wife , uncle, grandpa, mother, etc rather than do what Huckabuck
does which is publish bullshit and run on donations from the working poor because he learned
to thump their heart strings at Baptist seminary. I lump him right in there with faith healers
who are raking in some real money. Which goes to show you the biblical truth that you cannot
be lukewarm. He is not going to be more than a sideshow at political stuff and he lacks the
polish of good religio-con man, say like Benny Hee-haw. Maybe Janet should find a good job,
selling siding somewhere.
Posted by: eLwood
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September 4, 2008 12:15 PM
Huckabee is an excellent example of what's wrong with America-AT&T. All style and no substance, words spoken to YOU that are all about ME. Huck has the gifts of a big box preacher. While his sincerity is only 1/64th of an inch deep, he's got good delivery. And if you're an elderly shut-in, his jokes are fresh and funny.....the first time you hear them anyway.
His ability honed from years of making a happy talk over a the dead body of a person he never met works well in politics and Fox News. He is a walking Peoples Magazine. What he says is timed to the length of the average bowel movement. His words are to be heard, not studied. Don't crust them up with fact checking. His message is good for the uneducated ears, but bad for the soul. Give to Huck all the honor and glory and cash and Huck will give unto you, Huck. Not my idea of a good deal.
A man who works so damn hard for himself will only produce good things for himself, as we've seen. Let him make all the money he wants, it's just in the last 10 or 15 years, Huckabee hasn't been selling any product I need or want. Perhaps if his friends and followers want to make Huck happy and willing to go on into that good night, they'll take up a collection and have 4 or 5 Saddam like statues made in Huck's likeness for Huck's yard, a couple of thousand bronze belt buckles with Huck's face on them and of course one solid 24k gold belt buckle just for Huckabee, cause the best part will be him being able to lord his gold belt buckle over all those wearing the bronze.
Go thru his house naming every object after either Mike or Janet....the Mike Huckabee plaid sofa, the Janet Huckabee swivel rocker, the Mike Huckabee Master Bathroom, the Janet Huckabee SwifferŽ Sweeper and so on. Set up his stereo so it plays his greatest speeches mixed with Christian music that uplifts the saints and songs about Jerry Falwell. Make sure everything is followed by at least 3 minutes of canned applause.
And don't forget the vanity license plates Mike 1 & Janet 1. And and and be sure to show him plans for a giant marble mausoleum that will be 2 stories and bigger than any building in Hope, Arkansas and promise you're gathering funds now so it will be ready for when God calls them home. Remember...those statues have to be a little bigger than life-size and be placed so they'll be seen from every window.
If someone will do that for the Huckabees, they'll be happy....they'll shut up....they'll stay home....they'll die happy. And isn't that exactly what all of us wants to happen?
Posted by: Deathbyinches
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September 4, 2008 02:30 PM
DBI AND ALL YOU NAYSAYERS... YOU ARE JEALOUS AND IT IS REALLY SHOWING..
JUST DO US ALL A FAVOR AND S T F U
Posted by: LargeAss
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September 4, 2008 10:06 PM
OH YES.. AND P.S. PLEASE KEEP THAT UNDER 8 PARAGRAPHS.. PULEEEEEEEEEZ
CHEEEZE LOUISE. GET A GRIP.. OR WRITE A BOOK.
Posted by: LargeAss
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September 4, 2008 10:08 PM