Arkansas Blog

Does it have the hilarious Huckabee family Christmas card photo from a few years ago?

Jealous much? No one would buy a book about Max Brantley's Christmas memories.

I can see it now. All the Brantleys going to sleep early on Christmas Eve, each one expecting someone else to provide the free presents. How sad.

santa........the only sad thing on this thread is your comment.

Could be, but anyone who buys a HuckaBook is just another low-intelligence ChristoFascist dipshit. Have you ever read one? Stunningly shallow would be the BEST description. But I am surprised to learn that God "designed" Christmas!! 'fess up folks, did YOU know that?!!

Dumb & Dumber.

I'll bet Mama-Rev-Sis-Huckster had a heckuva time sweeping the Christmas tree needles off that dirt floor.

Since Mike appreciates the simple things, he makes gift giving simple for you: he's registered at Target, Gander Mountain, etc.

Max -- now what have we TOLD you about staying away from them naughty and unsuitable sites on that internet? What were you doing that led you to find this piece of horseshit??? I think the Mrs. ought to put some controls on your internet browser is what I think.

Xmas in July, oh happy day. Perfect beach reading. Heaven help us all. I guess he released it in July so it would look better when it was on sale for 1/2 price or less when Xmas actually rolls around. buy one, get ten free.

"Santa," whoever you are, do you even know who the Brantleys are? why, Max hasnt raised the price of my blog subscription in such a long time I dont even remember when it was.

IMHO, personal attacks on Max, who provides this forum for us, & especially rude remarks about his family, who have nothing to do with the Times blog, are completely out of line.

By "ChristoFascist dipshits" you mean "Christians?" Sounds like you're a really open-minded, unhasty, free-thinking, Solomonesque progressive, whom we should all emulate and trust to make informed judgements on which we can all base our own opinions.

But apparently you read a book, too? What's that make you?

Dumbest.

God did design Christmas.

He/she/it created the winter solstice and some critters that were smart enough to recognize it and use it to their advantage as a marker of time. With nothing better to do in the cold and darkness than take their harvest and make goodies out of it and be thankful for just being there it became a holiday.

Then Christians came along and decided and turned it a birthday party. Sears and Roebuck came along and decided they could sell a lot of stuff. Coca Cola invented Santa Claus to sell soda pop. The Lions Club invented the Christmas tree. Walmart made it cheaper. Southern Comfort and Valium made it bearable.

bugelf - YOU get the History Award for nailing it!! THAT however is not Huck's God - his is the one of only 6,000 years ago, give or take. As for Santa: nice to hear from you Trolls, buh-bye now!

>>Jealous much? No one would buy a book about Max Brantley's Christmas memories. <<

And my money says that the Brantley's wouldn't take a poor woman's wedding ring as political donation and do
a TV show about it either.

One thing about Ark is that no one grows them dumber, cept maybe Texas where the wedding
ring woman lives.

Then maybe Santa hails from Texas.

I had a dream.

No, really.

A Mike Huckabee dream and it's uncanny his "Simple Christmas" book showed up on this post because I dreamed this four nights ago!

It was like this tiny one-camera local studio in some bayou (I remember the cypress knees so well and there was this alligator) and Huckabee was dressed as Santa sitting in front of a green-screen in a cardboard sleigh whipping a cardboard reindeer while a stagehand sprinkled Ivory Flakes on him and Huck hawked a really nice Bible on the installment plan.

Janet towered beside me, crying softly. "All he ever wanted was to be loved," she whispered.

Then I woke up and started thinking back to, you know, like reality.

Short? Fat? Computer drives? Nice? Nuts? Childish?

I'm thinking, "Is my dream bullshit? Prophetic?"

Anyhoo, it's on my To Do List for next Monday to analyze it.

Because, to be honest, I remember feeling . . . when I woke up . . . God, how sad: Huck's morphed into Jabba the Hutt shilling salvation on Public Access in Monroe?

Hollywood, and dreams, can be so cruel, crumble so quickly.

Another one of your very bestest NormaB!

Your loyal fan, elwood.

It's refreshing to find that Huck still has one admirer smart enough to find his way on the Internet Tubes to this blog. Even the devil ought to have one fan on earth. The HuckaBooks will come in handy when a fake toilet paper shortage is manufactured by Kimberly-Clark in a few years. Nothing would give me more pleasure than wiping my ass with a page from one of Huck's books.

Fortunately I got no eyeballs down there, so no precious mind will be infected as I clean up after a big post-Christmas bowel movement. If there is a heaven...P.T. Barnum is looking down and smiling on Mike Huckabee. So few have managed to sell so little for so much for so long.

"So few have managed to sell so little for so much for so long. " - DBI

Ah, the mellifluous phrasing of the British lion Sir Winston combined with the acerbic wit of our own deathbyinches truly makes the English language the greatest of all tongues.

Truly a trip to the ol' two-holer won't be complete without a wipe from this self-centered charlatan's pamphleteering. It so reminds me of my sister-in-law showing us pictures of her vacations: "And here I am in front of the Vatican and here I am standing in front of the Grand Canyon and here I am......"

Sic 'em, Assmunch!!

bugeyed little freak,
It wasn't the Lions Club that invented the Christmas tree . . .

Centuries ago in Great Britain, woods priests called Druids used evergreens during mysterious winter solstice rituals. The Druids used holly and mistletoe as symbols of eternal life, and place evergreen branches over doors to keep away evil spirits. Late in the Middle Ages, Germans and Scandinavians placed evergreen trees inside their homes or just outside their doors to show their hope in the forthcoming spring. Our modern Christmas tree evolved from these early traditions.

Adopting prevalent traditions to tie to the Christmas celebration (designed by the Christian church to supplant pagan sartunalia celebrations) helped to supplant other pagan rituals and traditions.

However, the Christian religion (mine by the way) has always been commercial in its applications,i.e. selling of indulgences, papal bulls, cardinalcies, etc. and the tradition remains. CLIK for the large concession/gift shop on the roof of St. Peter's Basilica in Vatican City, Rome, where you can buy a COke, slides, medal, rosaries etc. before returning down through the dome to the altar and nave.