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Thursday, March 29, 2007 - 17:30:13
Bwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!
"The greatest pop culture blog on the planet. Or maybe not."
Okay, so Girl Arkansas at ARMedia blog turned me on to this blog, hysterical, just hysterical, if this is just one person, they are rocking! Anywho, two things on there that I had to pass along:
Woman breaks into frat house to pleasure herself....I kid you not.
Crystal Meth: Now in Cherry Cola!.....
If someone understands the whole thing where I link to their blog and stuff, please explain, I tried, I failed, I used direct links, but go to YBNBY, it slays me.
Confidentially doubting those couches were thrown away, Mr. Rickey...
50 Confidential Blogs!
Okay, this is the 50th Central Arkansas Confidential blog entry...thank you, thank you, I didn't prepare anything, this is such a surprise... it's been a rough road, some things didn't go as planned and some unplanned things got going, but I'm starting to get the hang of some of this (I think.) I would like to thank the academy, Max for the opportunity, all the other Ark Times Blogs out there, it's an honor just to be on the same page of links as you, everyone at the Arkansas Times, all my readers, you know who the four of you are, Belinda over an Ninjapoodles who has commented in the face of adversity for me and my parents. Above all I want to thank the Lord Jesus Christ who is in Heaven, shining down his radiance upon me as I go forth in this and all endeavours, I'm just trying to hold it down for God, the Almighty on the Highest of Highs. Fight Global Warming. Peace out, catch my new blog, "Bwahahahahahahaha" dropping immediately above this one on 3-29-07. Peace out, Bizmark, AR till I die!
Confidentially, Mr. Rickey!
Wednesday, March 28, 2007 - 13:26:46
Save Internet Radio...FOR ME!
Friends, Bloggers, Counrtymen, Ninjapoodles, lend me your eyes!
Apparently, Congress has found time not to work on getting the troops out of deadendsville Iraq or boosting the lagging economy, instead taking time out to tackle the issue of royalties from streaming Internet stations to music companies. Now, I don't profess to know all the facts, like how much these internet radio stations make or how much big music companies are losing because of them, but I do know that this cuts into Mr. Rickey's happiness, and we can't have that.
See, as many of you probably also contend with, my office has that piped in "muzak", which, for some reason, the least not being the person in charge of the machine is this bland and boring, it is continously playing "Lite-Jazz Adult Contemporary Instrumental" selections. First of all, I don't even think that's a real genre and second of all, if it is a real genre, it shouldn't be. This channel plays things like, "You're Beautiful" - James Blunt, "Bootilicious" - Beyonce, "SexyBack" - Justin Timberlake, and anything by Celine Dion all re-interpreted as lite, intstrumental jazz, which is ridiculous and probably a crime against humanity. (Of course, "The New Woman" loves it, she just can't stand silence, which I don't believe she's ever experienced as she never stops talking, sipping her diet coke or eating dry cereal like a Holstein crunching gravel long enough to know what silence is.).
So I hooked up iTunes on my work computer and got some headphones and life was good. Until, again thanks to the new woman who put my name on her IT request to get a virus off her computer, some IT guy got on my computer instead and found iTunes on my machine and DELETED IT! and then asked me where this virus was....
So, now with no iTunes, and not wanting to bring my iPod up here and listen to it, I found Accuradio through a friend, and problem solved. Tons of channels with tons of music I had never heard. So work was finally barable again and I was finding tons of music I had to purchase from iTunes and add to the collection.
But now Congress, or more specifically something called the US Copyright Royalty Board, wants to put royalties on these stations that will effectively price them out of existence all to appease the Record Label Lobby that somehow can't understand that it's 2007 and their artists need a presence on the web other than their own website. Most people can't get a traditional radio signal in their office any more, I know I can't, and therefore, I spend most of my time listening to streaming radio. How this differs from traditional radio and music companies, I don't know. I mean if I want to pirate songs off of internet radio, I can, just like I can pirate them off traditional radio using a tape recorder or an FM receiver hooked into my computer. And now with "HD Radio" that will be even easier. Meanwhile, streaming channels stream at rates that sound okay, but are no where near CD quality. The simple fact is, the typical computer user isn't doing that, and anyone serious pirater isn't wasting their time on the quality. People are just listening to the radio.
Accuradio takes donations, they have ads and it is only mildly customizable, so you can't just listen to one artist's cd the whole time, so there's exposure to lots of different artists, WHICH IS GOOD FOR RECORD COMPANIES TRYING TO SELL RECORDS. And furthermore, they have direct links to places where you can purchase what you are listening to, again, GOOD FOR THOSE TRYING TO SELL RECORDS.
I realize music sales are down, way down, and you know why that is? Because it's easier to pirate music than to legally purchase and use it as you see fit. I don't file share, I don't run off 100's of copies of bootlegs and I don't buy bootlegged anything. So why punish me? You need to punish the people who are running these fileshare sites, or the people who are mass producing rip off cds, or anyone other than yours truly and his internet radio station.
So readers, click below to sign a petition against this new legislation:
And checkout Accuradio!
-Rock on, Mr. Rickey
Wednesday, March 21, 2007 - 13:06:04
Issues for today...
Well, I want to do a television blog, but I have no time, and I don't know how to use templates, so that takes about three hours to write and construct, so we'll see... here's some stuff on my mind right now... this would probably be easier if I just emailed Belinda...
Issue #1: The "new woman" who is a gossipper and an instigator and is right now wearing so many shades of "off-white" I'm close to a seizure, just said, as she always does in a loud whisper like someone saying "She has [hushed] cancer",like whispering makes it not so bad or something, uhhh the worst! Anyway, in commenting on the fact that another person in our office no longer uses paper checks as it is 2007 and you can do that: "Does he not have a check, everyone has a checking account, I can't believe that, I hope everythings all right, I mean he makes enough money, you would think he could write a check..." At which point I had to cut her off and present the idea, in her little world of kitten posters, peanut butter Captain Crunch, teal eye shadow and Adam's family ringtones that perhaps, just perhaps, he uses his "Checkcard" and "On-line banking" take care of his finances and not Looney Toons checks, as she promptly showed all of us, to prove that she does indeed have checks that she can write on and "wouldn't be caught dead without them." I believe she is actually a test from the Lord, and like Job, I must have patience. If anyone hears of a good job out there for an underly stimulated writer with great computer skills and some self-taught graphic design ability, send it my way.
Issue#2 - Totally got hooked on American Idol this year, dang it! And while I hate reality shows, I want Lakisha and Melinda to do well and make records "cuz they can sang." That said, what the hell was going on with the crying girl on the show last night? That was ridiculous. She was balling, BALLING, like the four Beetles had stepped off the plane from Britain into her living room and all simultaneously offered to marry her upon her 18th birthday in a ceremony presided over by Justin Timberlake and featuring Dora the Explorer as her maid of honor - FOR SANJAYA! She was insanely crying over SANJAYA! Honey, first of all, he is terrible, and I mean terrible, I've seen better karaoke at 11:30pm at a redneck wedding. Secondly....SEE #1, if at this age she can't tell he's living in Worstville, population Sanjaya, then she is tone deaf or something and needs to see a doctor. Now watch her be some terminally ill child from the Make-a-wish Foundation......
Issue#3- There was a big blinking road sign on I40 today that said "RIGHT LANE CLOSED AHEAD" with one of those arrows telling you to get in the left lane or DIE! So I do, everyone is creeping along, but we'll get through it together.....hmmm right lane still clear, but there is a new orange sign that says "ROAD WORK 1/2 MILE", well its coming up, okay......"ROAD WORK 1500ft", yet curiously not a barrell, not a cone, not a ATHD truck in sight...you know where this is going.... there was no construction, not even the appearance they were getting ready to construct anything... meanwhile it's the Wild West trying to get back in the right lane for my exit... What the F? Too early in the morning for make-believe traffic drama.
Issue #4 -Al Gore is testifying in front of Congress on Global Warming. Apparently people in Congress are starting to realize that it isn't "a hoax" and maybe we should think about thinking about thinking about doing something about doing something about Global Warming... Once, just once can Congress get in front of the curve on something other that a pay raise, a proclamation to make tomorrow "University of Florida Football Day" or sending pork to their lobbiests....oh, and then today, Diane Reem (sp?) had some spokesperson from the Bush Administration on about the controversy over that oil lobbyist that was on staff and change some report on Global Warming to basically say "it may or may not be happening, and if it is, it isn't that bad," when the original, SCIENTIST'S findings were much more serious. Well, while I'm not going into all that or how wrong it is that some douche that works for big oil and Dubbya, which is like the same company anywyay,
[ASIDE: New woman went out at lunch and bought the same exact purse, color and all, as this other woman in the office bought yesterday, because "I couldn't let you have the cutest purse in the office today and it looks so good with my eyes"...MY MIND IS MELTING! WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? MY MIND IS MELTING! She had no response to my question, "What does that even mean?" other than to whisper, of course, "I don't think [the other woman] got her's on sale, I did." WHAT?! And she just offered coffee, that she didn't make, nor knows how to make, to guys from some construction company who obviously just bought cokes from the coke machine, that they were opening as they walked by her...... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!, and we're back...]
but I will say that Diane didn't let him spew Republican mumbo jumbo, she's still a firecracker. See An Inconvenient Truth, it will unscramble your mind and make you walk more...
Issue#5: Through the grapevine (hee, hee) I hear there's some new wine and cheese bar downtown called "Crush", a stone's throw from the ArkTimes offices, literally, I believe in the old Firehouse Subs. Anywho's, they're having a opening celebration 4-8pm this Saturday, with insanely cheap wine prices and refreshments, etc. When I say insane, I mean literally pennies for a glass and there's going to be a bucket of pennies at the door....anway here's the tip on biz from the kids over at Arkansas Business, it sounds like a cool little idea, well see if the Rivermarket crew takes to it, maybe they'll have to have some mud wrestling...
Thanks to my friend who forwarded this to me: Go here, listen to 500 Hobo names, it's priceless.
Confidentially yours, Mr. #619 Nosepicker Rick(ey) Pick
Thursday, March 15, 2007 - 15:42:08
Overheard in Little Rock
"Gay is this year's black." - myspace.com tag
"I'm not a hunter, I'm a gatherer" - Rivermarket at Lunch
[Woman 1] - "I just wanna say, I don't care for Melinda [Doolittle]."
[Woman 2] - "Well, I just wanna say, I don't care for you." - Starbucks on Cantrell.
"ADHD is like the worst ADD you can have, it's like the worst, so if I can't do something, it's like the best reason why." - kid at Chilli's on Rodney Parham.
Have something overheard in the Rock? Email caconfidential@gmail.com, or comment.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007 - 14:40:08
No calls in the stalls, y'all....
I never thought this would be an issue, but I guess it is, so let me clear this up: please don't talk on your cellphone in a public bathroom. Wait, let me preface this by saying:Don't Talk on a Phone To Anyone While Using the Bathroom.Now, I know you married/engage/going steady/in "stupid love"couples do this all the time when you're at home and it's gross, seriouslybut if it's like just a friend, or an acquaintance or something, no, you don't talk on the phone while you're doing your business. Is this really an issue?
Are there people who can justify that their lives are so busy andtheir time so valuable that they can't be "off-the-grid" while they drop the kids off at the pool? Seriously? I want to hear from you if you have to speak to people on the phone while on throne.Let me preface my preface statement, by saying this crude discussion about discussions in the El bano came about because while I was in a PUBLIC bathroom, like not an office building bathroom, but like a place of shopping, heavily traversed restroom area, not only was one person in a stall, taking care of business, but was also, in a voice far too loud for use in the bathroom, speaking with someone in what sounded like Mandarin Chinese. Perhaps things are different in other countries, I haven't found much difference in other countries that I've gone to with this particular feeling, but I thought here in the U.S., we all pretty much felt like the bathroom was a place where we didn't need to be contacted. First, I don't want to be talking to someone and some sound, either from me or the stall next to me, reverberate in the background. How do you explain that, assuming didn't start your conversation off with "Hey, how's it going, I'm calling you from the crapper." Plus there's the paper rolling off the huge wagon wheel roll of tissue; there's the industrial, jet engine flush, not to mention the many grunts, moans, 'ga-geezes"(I laughed out loud when I heard that a few years Back),ummphs and other exclamations made by the creme-dela-creme of society next to you.
BEWARE TANGENT: Why, why, why guys? Why do we need to make ridiculous vocalizations while we're in there. Like other people in there don't know what you are in there doing or that your are "relieved" to have done it. That's what everyone (we hope) is in there doing, relieving themselves. There is no need to sound like it's the fifth set final at Wimbeldon to prove to us how much you had to go or how much effort it is taking to do so. This is one place where competition is not a priority unless there's a keg a toga theme awaiting you outside those doors. Sweet Lord, try doing some breathing exercises if you are having that much anguish during your private time. Okay, back to the original point I was trying to make, no phones on the throne! Seriously, that's gross, I don't want to talk to you while you're doing your thing. Excuse yourself and call me back, it's okay. And if talking while sitting down is bad, what I just witnessed a mere ten minutes ago, is ridiculous. Some dude, about 30ish, walks into the restroom on the phone while I'm going to wash my hands. First off, whence you enter the restroom, the phone goes in the pocket, in it goes, you need to focus up. Second, he walks up, checks his hair and stuff, yapping away about something being in some drawer as I lather and try not think of all the many ways he is a total douche bag at that moment. Finally he heads to the urinals, still talking mind you, loud and echoing through the entire room so as to cause our Chinese friend to talk even louder, Sweet Lord, where are the hand towels?So as I get some hand towels and walk out, I see this guy, leaned up on the partition of one of the urinals, cradling the phone betwixt his head and shoulder while presumably trying to aim and not drizzle. And that is the first time I've seen that one in real life. Apparently I'm just too conservative or something, but call me crazy (YOU'RE CRAZY!) the phone is not meant to be used at that most crucial of daily function times. Other times include, but are not limited to:
Anytime you are eating with another person or in a setting in which your conversation would be deemed "annoying as hell" to other diners.
Anytime you are getting your "freak on". Let me go to your voicemail, it can wait.
Anytime you are in a conversation with another person. Period. It's rude to take a call in middle of someone's story about how their aunt died in a cheese grating accident.
Anytime you are engaged in transaction with someone, i.e. ordering, paying for, returning, getting a price check asking for help, etc. at a store, drive through window, so forth and so on. Don't be an ass. DURING ANY MOVIE, PLAY, LIVE PERFORMANCE in which the sound of your phone ringing and/or you talking about "meeting up later at DEEP and getting 'blitzed', (the kids are using that these days?)" is distracting to those who want to hear the show and not your plans for later that evening.
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I am, I don't think so, but maybe I am. I mean, those are just a few suggestions, from Mr. Rickey, confidentially, of course....
caconfidential@gmail.com
Vintage...crap....
[arghhhhh!] Today I'm shaking my fist at one of my favorite clothing retailers, "j.crew" and their "vintage polo" shirts!
What the hell! People, quit buying new clothes that look like they're used, this is ridiculous. Just go to Savers or Salvation Army or Good Will and buy said worn out polo, there's at least one that fits you. Check to make sure it doesn't have any crazy noticeable stains, give them $4 or whatever, take it home, wash it and wear it out, boom, there's your "vintage" look you tard.
I especially love the close up pictures of the "wear and tear" places on the shirt tail and the collar...."hand-nicked" and "broken-in"... just wear your clothes and it will do the same thing....
Look all you kids out there, and that's anyone 29 & Under to me; this crap is not vintage. This shirt has not been through "ump-teen" parties with you, had every imaginable alcoholic beverage spilt on it, sat on your bedroom floor for a month under a full inch of dirty laundry, soaked blood from your cut lip or been peeled off by your lover in the heat of the moment - IT'S BEEN WASHED/DRIED/WASHED/DRIED over and over in a big machine ala the "acid wash" process. It was a new shirt someone made to look old. Be cool, get a new polo shirt and wear the hell out of it, don't try to be cool, just be cool....
Furthermore, "vintage" [shaking fist, typing angry email to jcrew customer care] implies that it is old, at least a decade, the correct terminology for this "vintage polo" is "distressed polo" and/or "douche bag polo".
Getting off my high horse now....vintage polo, how dare they, HOW DARE THEY! This is the same company that carried, standard, seersucker and corduroy suits, all year around. AND SOMEONE FIX THAT MODEL'S COLLAR FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, NO ONE WEARS A SHIRT LIKE THAT WHO ISN'T IN AN EMO BAND OR BAKED OUT OF THEIR MIND.....
Confidentially dismayed in what was once a great clothing brand, Mr. Rickey
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