Grover Norquist: Republicans won't become severed rat heads if they support THIS tax increase | Arkansas Blog

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Grover Norquist: Republicans won't become severed rat heads if they support THIS tax increase

Posted By on Thu, Mar 14, 2013 at 4:59 PM

Grover Norquist rat head image
  • Norquist: Don't put my head in a Coke bottle!

We reported earlier today that Americans for Tax Reform and Grover Norquist — everybody's favorite clown in a papal hat — gave the go-ahead for a nickel increase on the timberland tax that would bring in $700,000 a year for the Forestry Commission. Scared Republicans could take comfort that voting for the tax increase wouldn't violate the sacred Pledge, per Mr. Norquist.

You can understand why they'd be nervous, since at CPAC today, Norquist explained that raising any tax at all was a bit like putting a severed rat head in a Coke bottle.

Everybody knows what's in Coca Cola. So you can buy a bottle of Coke, take it home, you don't have to ask what's in it or read the ingredients or ask your friends about it. You just take it home and you drink it. If you get two thirds of the way through your bottle of Coke and you look in and there's a rat head in what's left in your Coke bottle, you do not say to yourself, 'you know, I'm wondering whether I'm going to finish all the rest of this particular bottle of Coke this evening.' You begin to wonder whether you're going to buy Coke in the future.

We branded the Republican Party as the party of not raising taxes — branding is important. Republican elected officials who vote for tax increases are rat heads in a Coke bottle. They damage the Republican brand.

I've always thought that the conservative movement needed more psychedelic metaphors, so kudos!

More seriously, if local lawmakers had any balls, they'd tell this dweeby D.C. insider that they can think for themselves, thank you very much. That applies to the anti-tax folks too. If you know what you believe, you don't have to sign a ridiculous pledge and then wait with bated breath for Norquist to tell you what's okay.

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