What in the hell? | Central Arkansas Confidential

Thursday, July 19, 2007

What in the hell?

Posted By on Thu, Jul 19, 2007 at 10:31 AM

Note this entry was typed a few months ago, this recall is not recent and was for over heating not China Lead Paint stuff, anyway, I forgot to publish it, but here it is now...

So this is how my mind and then my day work, I got to read Yahoo! News stories as I drink my coffee and resign myself to another day at "the job" with "the new woman", who's the worst.  I read a story about a recall for Hasbro Easy Bake Ovens.  A toy, which all of you should remember and love.  My neighbor Kathy had one and would make me vanilla cakes because she knew I didn't dig on chocolate.  No, not the best cake in the world, but cake made by a kid your age always tasted good, it was part of our independence...and she made me eat it, her mom babysat me sometimes...memories, water colored memories...anyway, I got to the Easy Bake sit to check it out, looks like it's been redesigned, their also pushing somekind of My Little Pony Sno Cone maker, when we all know the only sno-cone maker you need is the Snoopy Sno-Cone maker, hello?

Anyway, after getting my fix of Easy Bake nostalgia, and can I just ask, when did everyone become concerned with wheat and gluton and eggs and stuff in these mixes, when I was kid, you just ate it, if it made you sick, you didn't eat anymore, whatever... so I go on to the Hasbro site to check out toys, because theI shake my fist at Hasbro and their product line of "Baby Alive" dolls.  Have you seen these things?  Are you purchasing these ingenius money traps for your kids?  First off, they are disgusting, this is the actual description from the website: "Originally introduced in 1973, the much-loved BABY ALIVE doll is back to play with a whole new generation of little girls.

She still "eats" and "poops", and now she's more “life-like” than ever. Best of all, your little girl is sure to love playing "mommy” to this special doll as much as you did years ago."

Uhhh, negative ghost rider, the pattern is full.  First of all, what's with the Japanimation eyes? Scary.... Furthermore, what in the hell is it "pooping"? Some sort of paste concoction from the junk they sell to put in it's mouth?  And how does one clean this doll so mold doesn't grow inside it?  And what happens if your child forgets to put the doll's diaper on?  Well, I suppose it craps everywhere, huh, like a real kid.  Wow, I don't know, teaching you 4 yr. old to care for a "baby" seems dangerous.  I mean what if they want to change little brother while you're out of the room...  Why can't kids just be kids and, I don't know, pretend they are changing a dirty diaper.

WHY?  Because that would let them sell you replacement diapers and food for the TOY! It's such a gimmick, just like a real baby.... JK, JK, I kid, I kid, but still, wouldn't these be better for teenagers to keep them from having unprotected sex?  Look what you get, poopy baby....

I wonder if there's a colic add-on kit?

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