American braces for injustice | Rock Candy

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

American braces for injustice

Posted By on Wed, May 6, 2009 at 10:15 AM

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Kris Allen, dreaming of punching Danny Gokey in the balls.

So here's what happened last night: The prohibitive favorite, Tim Curry from "Rocky Horror Picture Show," after last week's brief fall from grace, once again became the prohibitive favorite. He did "Whole Lotta Love" and he sounded a whole lot like Robert Plant. On speed. In a drag show. The magenta-haired ingenue gave Janis Joplin's "Cry Baby" all the awesome grrrrowlin' we've come to expect from her. The terrible, terrible gentleman on the right above mangled "Dream On" to such a degree that rogue governments everywhere are furiously downloading it for their torture mixes. And Kris Allen offered another understated, fairly inventive take on a good song. This time "Come Together."

And, oh yeah, the producers threw Kris under the bus. First, they made him duet Danny Gokey, who is always, as Jamie Foxx would say, competing in the "throat Olympics." Who wears pin-stripe vests. Who offers smug "thank yous" to the crowd after performances. Who, to briefly return to the abomination that was "Dream On," adds "doobie do doh" vocal flourishes in between screeches. Then, Simon wrongly said Danny sang better in the duo's version of "Renegade." Then, Kris had to follow the duet with his solo performance, rather than the producers arranging all the duets together. Then, the judges had tepid things to say and Simon, extending his weird water metaphors with Kris, inscrutably compared his performance to "eating ice." Meanwhile, the judges acknowledged that Danny wasn't very good, but gave him "A++" for effort.

Over at EW, number one Kris Allen fan Michael Slezak offers a nugget of hope: He says the longtime "American Idol" viewers have gotten more perceptive and embittered by obvious producer meddling that fans might rise up in protest against an obvious agenda to send Kris Allen home. Too, last night was clearly a rallying cry for would-be voters who may've been complacent in weeks past.

Thoughts, Kris Allen fans/haters?

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