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Inconsequential News Quiz: Deep Throat Edition 

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1) A small strip mall shopping center in the 300 block of Rock Street that fell to the wrecking ball recently has a surprising place in Little Rock history. What happened there that's of historical note?

A) Hillary Clinton's first condescending scowl.

B) The first Arkansas screening of the film "Deep Throat" in 1973, after which all the theater's employees were arrested.

C) Arkansas Times Senior Editor Max Brantley's first, ultimately disastrous, attempt at shaking his groove thing.

D) The first successful melding of melted Velveeta and Rotel tomatoes, thus ushering in the golden age of Arkansas cuisine.

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2) With the Sears store at 600 S. University Ave. in Little Rock set to close soon, the rumor mill says an interesting new tenant might be taking over the giant space. Who, according to local scuttlebutt, is the prospective tenant?

A) Useless Bullshit Warehouse.

B) Costco.

C) House of Baz Teeth Whitening and Tan-o-Rama (David Bazzel, proprietor).

D) The Arkansas Department of Ignorance.

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3) Sen. Jason Rapert (R-Conway) recently took to social media to ask supporters for contributions to fund a certain endeavor. What is he shilling for?

A) Jason Rapert's Neverending Butthurt, a new barbecue sauce that's supposedly excellent on pork butts.

B) Man-sized hamster ball, to keep him safe from all the sickening progress and empathy here in the 21st century.

C) New edition of the Bible that features all the stuff he agrees with in 20-point type.

D) A 501(c)(3) nonprofit run by Rapert, with Rapert saying contributions are a way for supporters to help him "continue to stand strong personally and keep speaking out."

4) Recently, the watchdog group Center for Public Integrity dug up a Federal Election Commission filing that says former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee has settled a lawsuit. What was the reason for the lawsuit?

A) Reneged on an agreement to do a paid celebrity endorsement for Bill's Fat Again Slacks ("the slacks with a drawstring!").

B) General dickery.

C) He'd been sued for copyright infringement for playing the Survivor song "Eye of the Tiger" during a rally for Kentucky clerk Kim Davis, who had refused to issue marriage licenses to LGBT couples.

D) Backed out of a deal to host the new NBC reality show "Celebrity Failure."

5) Former professional morality scold Josh Duggar, who disappeared from public view for several months after it was revealed that he inappropriately touched his sisters as a teenager and later turned up in the data from the hack of the affair-promoting website Ashley Madison, has reportedly resurfaced and is back to work. What, according to People Magazine, is he doing these days?

A) Feverishly saving puppies and kittens from burning buildings in an attempt to avoid being reincarnated as one of those beetles that only exist to push around a big ball of elephant shit.

B) Porno theater mopper.

C) Sandwich artist.

D) Used car salesman.

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