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Inconsequential News Quiz: 'We are all individuals' edition 

Play at home, while soaking up the sweet, sweet propaganda!

1) An anchor with KATV, Channel 7, in Little Rock recently took to the airwaves to read a statement that warns, in part, that some media outlets publish fake stories. What else was weird about the statement, which was presented as editorial commentary from a trusted face in local media?

A) It was actually pro-Trumpist propaganda written entirely by KATV parent Sinclair Broadcast Group, a corporate behemoth whose owner is a far-right Trump supporter.

B) As seen in videos online, the company forced dozens of local anchors at Sinclair-owned stations across the country to present the same statement, word for word, while giving no sign that the message wasn't drafted in-house.

C) The statement included the following, irony-exploding line: "Some members of the media use their platforms to push their own personal bias and agenda to control exactly what people think ... . This is extremely dangerous to a democracy."

D) All of the above.

2) Stock in the Arkansas-based data-mining company Acxiom took a tumble recently. What was the cause of the dramatic downturn?

A) When Trump tweeted his outrage at the cell phone version of the game Pac-Xon after losing a round during his daily briefing with the Joint Chiefs, the phone's auto-correct changed the name of the game to "Acxiom." Sad!

B) Acxiom researchers announced their belief that America may soon reach "peak moron."

C) Facebook said it would stop using companies such as Acxiom to provide data to the social media giant's advertising clients to help target their ads.

D) Acxiom's part in helping to compile the database known as "Project Alamo." Look it up.

3) It was recently announced that Arkansas-based retail giant Walmart will remove a certain magazine from checkout lines at more than 5,000 stores across the country. What's the magazine?

A) Gat Fancy.

B) Cosmopolitan.

C) Toothless Nudist Monthly.

D) Porks Illustrated.

4) An art teacher at Marked Tree High School accused of having sex with four students, including one who was a minor at the time, recently faced justice in an Arkansas courtroom. What was the outcome?

A) He received 40 years in prison.

B) He got 25 years in prison and was order to pay a $15,000 fine.

C) He was sentenced to 10 years in prison and lifetime registration on the state sex offender registry.

D) She was sentenced to probation, with zero prison time.

5) The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recently announced that Arkansas is first in the nation in a rather dubious category. In what way is Arkansas first, according to the CDC?

A) Pounds of pickled eggs consumed per month.

B) Merkin ownership per capita.

C) Duggarificness.

D) Binge drinking, with the average Arkansas power drinker slamming a liver-quivering 8.3 alcoholic drinks per binge.
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