Favorite

A newspaper advertisement for an upcoming marathon featured a photograph of two women, one wearing running gear and apparently in some pain, the other a snooty-looking sort carrying a metal dish. The copy said: “CHAFFING – It means different things to different people. Learn how to prevent chaffing …” But is it enough to prevent chaffing? Shouldn’t we also encourage wheating?

I’m reminded of the old joke about editors, doubtless popularized by disgruntled reporters: “An editor is someone who separates the wheat from the chaff, and keeps the chaff.”

“No, Katie Couric didn’t suddenly lose 20 pounds. The incoming CBS Evening News anchorman appears significantly thinner in a network promotional magazine photo thanks to digital airbrushing.” …

“Kyra Phillips, anchorman of CNN’s Live From …, unwittingly upstaged President Bush’s speech in New Orleans with on-the-air analysis of her husband and the marriage of her brother – all live from a CNN ladies’ room. … Atlanta-based Phillips, in conversation with an unidentified woman in an echoey room, dismissed most men as ‘a*******’, but called herself ‘very lucky in that regard.’ ” With two female “anchormen” in the same day’s newspaper, anchorman has evidently survived the demand for gender-neutrality. But it would be interesting to know what Couric and Phillips call themselves. Anchors, maybe, the way chairmen became chairs. I don’t think anchormen was what Phillips was dismissing most men as, by the way. I’ve known a lot of men who weren’t anchormen.

I’m sorry to see the college football season end, but not sorry for an end to “trickeration,” at least until next fall. I wonder if all the announcers spouting “trickeration” know that the real word is trickery. (The fourth-and-one pass play when the Hogs hadn’t completed one all day, was neither trickery nor trickeration. Stupidation is more apt.)

Favorite

From the ArkTimes store

  |  

Comments

Showing 1-1 of 1

Add a comment

 
Subscribe to this thread:
Showing 1-1 of 1

Add a comment

More by Max Brantley

More by Arkansas Times Staff

Most Shared

Latest in Words

  • The L word and the C word

    I was excited to see the newspaper headline "Bielema liberal." "After all those neo-Nazis, we've finally got a coach who thinks right," I told friends. "I wonder if he belongs to the ADA."
    • May 1, 2014
  • Who's exasperated?

    Jim Newell was gripped by exasperation himself after reading this item in the business section. "Exacerbated" is the word the writer wanted, he sagely suggests.
    • Apr 24, 2014
  • We will run no race before it's ripe

    "What year would Oaklawn recognize as its 100th anniversary? After all, Oaklawn's advertising material is ripe with 'Since 1904,' but it's widely reported the first race wasn't run until 1905."
    • Apr 17, 2014
  • More »

Event Calendar

« »

January

S M T W T F S
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31  

Most Recent Comments

  • Re: Banned in 2018

    • By God, I think Bob covered every goddam one of 'em! Thanks.

    • on January 16, 2018
  • Re: Banned in 2018

    • yes, why cant somebody force him to write us sumpthin at least oncet a month??

    • on January 15, 2018
  • Re: Playing to a crowd

    • To have a conversation with an unarmed man, would not be fair.

    • on January 15, 2018
 

© 2018 Arkansas Times | 201 East Markham, Suite 200, Little Rock, AR 72201
Powered by Foundation